The Liebster Award

Having switched blogging platforms for the umpteenth time last week, I was shocked, stunned and amazed to discover that somebody – obviously of wonderful judgement and gorgeousness, and obviously bowled over by the two or three forgettable posts I have spat out since – nominated me for an online award this weekend.

I wondered for a few moments what the award might be – perhaps the most unreliable blogger in the known world? The most blog migrations ever recorded? The most undecided platform switcher? The most widely travelled across the blogosphere?Nope. I have been nominated for a “Liebster” award.

Of course I already know what the Liebster award is. It’s kind of a crowd-sourced pyramid scheme, where anybody can nominate anybody else. It’s typically crowed about by new bloggers to attract attention to themselves by spamming the crap out of strangers, and then hoping the people they spam will link back, and spam more people.

After giving it great thought – whole seconds worth – I’ve decided not to play. I’m not going to link back to the person that nominated me, and I’m not going to spam my friends. I’m going to sit here in splendid isolation, and look smug while nobody takes any notice of my blog. They very probably didn’t read this far either, so I can now begin wallowing in self-pity about my lack of popularity on the interwebs.

Maybe I’ll go read some blogs, click heart icons, write comments, and email a few friends – you know – actually take notice of people, rather than spam them with some fake award I pulled out of my ass – and try to feel like I’m part of something, rather than admitting I’m just sitting here at work procrastinating famously.

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