You know how everybody seems to be going on and on and on and on and on and on about Bullet Journals at the moment? I have a cunning tip to aid you in your procrastinatory productivity efforts.
You know people write little lists of things to do, and tick them off, draw some stupid thing next to them, photograph them, then share them all over the internet so everybody can go “OH LOOK – YOU’RE WRITING IS SO CUTE!!” – well here’s what to do.
Make the following to-do list:
- Wake up (if it’s a week day – if weekend, all bets are off)
- Try to go back to sleep for a bit (if weekend, question if you need to get up at all before lunchtime)
- Stare at the ceiling until you absolutely have to get up (again – weekend rule may apply)
- Stagger to the bathroom, trying not to trip over the cat
- Turn on shower, and wait for the cold water to go back to whichever part of hell it came from
- Get in shower
- Wash hair with randomly chosen shampoo
- Get out of shower, leaving as big a puddle as possible on the floor
- Dry yourself off
- Brush your teeth, using the last bit of toothpaste out of a curled up tube
- Get dressed (choose hopefully clean clothes – base this decision on how many people you will need to interract with).
- Stumble towards the kitchen
- Make a coffee
- Turn on the radio
- Make another coffee
- Embark on “the great sock hunt”
You see how easy it is !? We’ve already filled an ENTIRE PAGE of a bullet journal, and you can tick each thing off after you’ve done it. Hell – nobody would really know if you had done any of it anyway, so you might as well tick the lot off – you know, just like the works of fiction you see all over Pinterest…
- Yoga with BFFs
- Get Eyebrows Done at Salon
- Vegan shopping at Deli
- Watch daytime TV while trophy husband magics money into bank
Maybe I’m just getting cynical about the whole bullet journal thing. Maybe not. I say maybe a lot. I’ve just noticed this.