Incorrect Assumptions

Incorrect Assumptions
Photo by Ahmed Nishaath / Unsplash

I think perhaps the most common misconception people have about me is that I am somehow popular, outgoing or the life and soul of some imaginary party they have constructed in their head. They couldn’t be further from the truth.

I’ve always been quiet, introverted, and somewhat shy. Over the years I have either begun to care less what other people think, or found strategies for coping with group situations. Typically at gatherings I’ll be the person talking to those that have become excluded from the various conversations around the room. I’m never the funny/smart/loud/exciting person in the middle of the room.

I remember going to a charity fund-raising dinner several years ago with some friends and sitting next to a somewhat extrovert school teacher – the life and soul of the party that particular evening. She turned to me (after several drinks) and said “you’re really funny! I had no idea!”.

A girl I used to work with once told me that when I’m happy I “shine” – but that when I’m concerned about anything, I disappear in plain sight. She wasn’t wrong. I guess half the problem is worrying not only about myself, but about others too. I’ve always done it.

So anyway. There’s my incorrect assumption. I’m not popular, not outgoing, and will rarely be found in the company of the noisy people at a gathering. I could write at length and do a full armchair psychiatric evaluation of myself – but it would serve no purpose for anybody but a really bored reader that happens upon this post.

I nearly forgot. If you’re a fellow introvert, and you want a great strategy for dealing with chatty people – ask them about themselves. They will invariably furnish you with their life story at a moment’s notice, and you get to avoid making conversation for several minutes. It’s very easy.