Zero Maintenance Haircut Please

Before rolling into the office this morning I stopped off in town to get my hair cut. Ten years ago the salon was “the place to go” for men with a roving eyepopulated with toothsome young women armed with all manner of conversation about your next holiday, the contents of “Cosmo”, or whichever footballer had been caught kissing the wrong girl.

I can still remember the day one of my colleagues walked into the office an hour late with the biggest grin on his face, and proclaimed to all “I had a head massage”. The girls in the office tutted, and the guys shook their heads (I suspect the single ones were trying to figure out if they too could warrant a haircut that very afternoon).

I digress.

I’m not sure if the politically correct brigade have had their way, but the mens hair place isn’t quite the place it once was. The owner is still the same, but the uniformly blonde staff with the tied shirts and mascara have long gone. Over the last couple of years a hassled (but funny) guy has cut my hairregaling me with stories of his son being bullied at school while trying to answer the morning quiz on Radio One.

Back to this morning"What are we doing today?““Zero maintainance haircut please"“What’s one of them?““Clippered, and cut short and scruffy on top"I then sat quietly while the very nice lady (albiet not blonde, not terifically toothsome, and not resplendant in a tied shirt) got on with hacking my hair off. While doing so she asked after my work, and instantly glazed over as I told her.

There are advantages to being a software developer after allif I had been a car mechanic, a plumber, or a heating engineer, she would no doubt have asked me to visit her house, her daughter’s house, her friend’s house, and her colleague’s houses to fix all manner of things in return for free haircuts.I could probably even communicate on to a tradesman everything wrong with her car, house, bathroom, and kitchen because I heard all about them for the best part of twenty minutes